Loved, Valued and Needed
Stop Avoiding the Valentine’s Day Blues
Valentine’s Day seems to hit us in the face as soon as the New Year starts. The grandiose store displays filled with red and pink hearts with cupid and his arrow flying about. We see it on T.V. or in our social media feeds from the jewelry commercials with the perfect couples or local restaurants advertising their fabulous dinner specials for two. If February 14 falls on a weekday, we experience the pressure of not receiving a candy or a flower delivery at work and watching as everyone else enjoys their gifts. For those of us who are single, Valentine’s Day can be frustrating and it’s easy to focus on the relationship we don’t have.
I used to mentally avoid this day, ignore the world and focus on my work. I was disappointed that I still hadn’t met someone to share my life with and watched as others would post about their amazing Valentine’s Day presents and outings. But thankfully, God grabbed a hold of my heart several years ago and it forever changed how I would approach this day. It’s not about focusing on what you don’t have, it’s about focusing on what you do have.
The Lord reminded me that I am loved, valued and needed.
Loved
We have a love available to us that is unlike any other. God’s love is not based on conditions, merit or anything we do – or don’t do. We are assured of this in Ephesians 2:8-9, “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast” (ESV).
For many of us who have suffered the pain of a broken heart, it’s hard to imagine that there is a love that is without end and won’t let us down. We read about this in Jeremiah 31:3, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you” (ESV). It was then I began to realize I had all the love I ever needed in the arms of my Father God.
We were given the greatest gift of love when God sent His Son Jesus so we could have eternal life and the forgiveness of our sins. Romans 5:8 says, “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (NKJV). This makes missing out on receiving chocolates and flowers seem minuscule, doesn’t it?
I thanked God for this newfound revelation. I had received the most incredible gift of all through Jesus and had been taking it for granted. I have freedom in Christ and can spend eternity in Heaven because I have accepted Him into my heart as my Lord and Savior (John 3:16).
Valued
I felt God leading me to look differently at how I valued myself. It wasn’t about my job title, the car I drove or my relationship status. My value wasn’t to be found in earthly things or the fact that I wasn’t dating anyone. I needed to look higher, and when I did, I discovered it’s found in the Creator of the universe, Who cares for me deeply. We see evidence of this sprinkled throughout scripture.
- He knows the number of strands of hair on your head (Luke 12:7).
- You’re seen as precious in the sight of God as well as honored (Isaiah 43:4).
- God is always thinking about you, more than all the grains of sand on your favorite beach (Psalm 139:18).
We are reminded of our value through how God cares for even the smallest of creatures, “Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” (Matthew 6:26 ESV). It’s like a light bulb went off. I may be single, but God cares for me more than I can begin to grasp, and I see my value in Him, not in any human being or through anything I can buy.
I began to enjoy the wonderful works of God that He created for me to enjoy! Do you ever catch a glimpse of the pastel colors infiltrating the sky during a sunset? Or the beauty of the snowcapped mountains after a storm or the stars as they twinkle in the sky? God cares for us and has set nature and the sights of the earth for us to relish in (Psalm 8:3-4)!
Needed
We’ve talked about how we are loved by God and deeply valued by Him. The other part of the equation God was downloading in me was that I am needed and important. I may not be in a relationship or fortunate enough to have had kids, but He has a calling on my life, a designated purpose. The job He has me in is specific. The people He has me living next door to is strategic. The volunteer role I have at church is important, and it’s not by chance I joined the gym I did.
God has given us all different skills, “In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well” (Romans 12:2 NLT). These talents aren’t just for your own good, they can also help others! The Bible instructs that “God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another” (1 Peter 4:10 NLT).
You are needed!
Your organizational skills help keep the team you’re on stay on track or your ability to have patience in the midst of chaos may be saving someone’s life. Maybe you’re the voice of reason in a friend’s life, or you’re a single parent who is the only stable force in your child’s life. You might just be the only person in your gym buddy’s life who will ever tell them about Jesus.
On top the abilities He’s graced you with, God has a special and unique plan for your life, carefully orchestrated while you were in your mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13-16). Your existence isn’t by chance, you have a purpose and are needed. “‘For I know the plans and thoughts that I have for you,’ says the LORD, ‘plans for peace and well-being and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope’” (Jeremiah 29:11 AMP). Your calling plays a significant role in God’s plan for others as well, from your kids and friendships to coworkers and family.
Your testimony, that storm you weathered will be used by God for His glory to undoubtedly help someone else who may be going through the exact same thing. It was registering in me that I didn’t need to be in a relationship to be needed, I had plenty of areas in my life where I was already being utilized by God.
So this Valentine’s Day, ask God to help you shift your focus to see the love, value and need you have in Him. Take a moment to remember God loves you and very much cares for you! He sees you, has a purpose for you and your calling is necessary to help others.
Laura Kruszewski, MBA | Family Life Radio Marketing & Public Relations Manager