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It's difficult telling my husband my needs. He minimizes them. He says he cares, but doesn't show that he does. I ask him to do things to help me, he says he will, but then doesn't. When I ask him why it wasn't done, he becomes defensive, so it makes me not want to ask. I think he knows this, so he takes advantage of it. I think I'm enabling him. Confronting him doesn't always feel safe. I feel alone, my needs go unmet. He doesn't take care of himself. His hygiene is very poor, and his health. His spaces in the home are disaster. messy and unclean. I don't know how to talk to him about this.