Why Self-Confidence Falls Short
Demi Tebow’s Journey to Trusting God
Demi Tebow is an entrepreneur, author of the book “A Crown that Lasts,” speaker, and advocate known for her deep Christian faith. Together, she and her husband, Tim Tebow support special needs advocacy, including the worldwide “Night to Shine” event, which celebrates individuals with special needs.
Like many of us in the beginning, Demi placed her confidence in herself, believing that her accomplishments and talents could provide the security she needed. But she quickly realized that self-confidence was fragile and often left her feeling empty.
“It wasn’t a wasted season, it was a waiting season.” ~Demi Tebow
“I don’t need self-confidence because I get to have full confidence in my Maker,” Demi shared in her conversation with Family Life Radio’s morning team. She explained how, after winning Miss Universe in 2017, she felt as though her identity was tied to the crown, the title, and the public recognition. When she had to give up the crown, that sense of accomplishment quickly faded, leaving her questioning her worth. “It wasn’t a wasted season, it was a waiting season,” she recalled, reflecting on how that period forced her to look for a more stable foundation for her identity and confidence.
The turning point for Demi came when she realized that her confidence couldn’t be based on something as fleeting as self-reliance. “I have to replace that word ‘self’ with something that is fixed, that is never changing, that is always trustworthy, and that is bigger than myself,” she said. That “something bigger” was her faith in God.
Demi explained that when we rely on ourselves, we set ourselves up for failure because we’re human—we are limited. “More often than not, I end up failing myself.” She recognized that true confidence came from trusting in God’s promises, not her own abilities. “Confidence, when you break it down, just means to have full trust,” Demi continued. “And I realized I needed to place my full trust in God, not myself.”
The Roller Coaster of Self-Reliance
Relying on self-confidence often leads to emotional highs and lows, especially when life takes unexpected turns. Demi described how each setback felt like a blow to her identity: “Every time there’s a transition, you hit this obstacle on the roller coaster… You’re asking that, ‘Well, what now? What’s next?’ question.” The emotional roller coaster left her questioning her purpose and value.
She recognized that when her identity was tied to temporary accomplishments, like her Miss Universe title, her confidence was tied to things that could disappear at any moment. “When I’ve rooted my identity in things that are temporary, it’s usually when I’ve also rooted my confidence in myself,” she admitted. She began to understand her need for a deeper, more secure foundation—one that wasn’t dependent on circumstances.
God-Confidence Brings Stability
Demi found that establishing her confidence in God brought the stability she had been missing. “I realized that I have to find something that allows me to have a stable, lasting identity,” she said. “An identity that’s not going to go on a roller coaster of emotions every time I hit a road bump.”
God-confidence means trusting in the eternal promises of a faithful Creator.
“God has made promises and kept promises throughout eternity, and I get to have full confidence in that,” she said. By placing her trust in God, Demi no longer felt the pressure to measure up to her own or others’ expectations. Instead, she found peace in knowing that her value and purpose rests securely in God’s hands.
How can you shift from self to God-confidence?
Here are some practical steps for anyone struggling with insecurity or wavering confidence.
- Acknowledge the limits of self-confidence.
Recognizing that we are fallible, and that self-confidence will always have limits is the first step to relying on God instead.
2. Replace self with God.
Start trusting in God’s eternal promises rather than your own temporary abilities or achievements.
3. Reflect on God’s faithfulness.
Spend time reflecting on how God has been faithful in your life and lean on that trust.
Self-confidence will never be enough to provide the lasting peace and security we crave. Demi challenges us to stop relying on ourselves and instead find true, unshakable confidence in God. In a world that constantly pushes us to believe in ourselves, Demi’s faith journey shows that real peace comes when we put our trust in the One who is always faithful.
More on this topic is available in Demi’s recently released book, “A Crown that Lasts: You Are Not Your Label.”
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